Welcoming new members

[shellonia]

I've been disturbed that recently there have been several new members join with very little knowledge of tortoise keeping and they are asking basic questions.Most of us are really pleased to answer anything and nothing is too trivial as we are all learning all of the time.However their threads have been hijacked by those who love controversy for its own sake and I have felt so sorry for the questioner.Has no-one noticed that recently a couple of people have ceased to post and they must be in more confusion than when they first asked.They may indeed have been put off the forum altogether and gone to get info from less reliable and informed sources.Personally I feel ashamed that Shelled Warriors allows this to happen and hope it isn't a future trend.

[ibizathetort]

I think more and more people are picking up on this feeling, I certainly have of late, I think I've mentioned it to at least 4 other members this week. I think its hard though to sort out what is just trouble making and what is just 'another viewpoint'

[yuna1971]

I have noticed this a bit, Shell.
I find sometimes its a bit 'I do it this way, therefore its the right way and any other way is wrong'.
I welcome debate, I like to participate but sometimes it does go on for pages with 2 people just going back and forth in their own arguments. xx
Would like to see what else is said on this.
Personally speaking, I like nothing more than to try and help a new owner. It really gives me pleasure to see them grow in confidence as an owner. I recognise that my opinions and suggestions are just that - and that my way of doing things isnt necessarily the right or only way, but ways and tips I have learnt from being on here and also what has worked for me. I think the key thing is that we share, and not dictate. xx

[shellonia]

wasn't so much that which got to me.it's the 'troll'and'fruitcake'type comment and i know a recent thread was closed.But probably not soon enough to lose members who had just joined.Great shame

[Alan1]

I usually say "what I do is".. then they can either use that or not. It's better than saying "this is what you must do". It is no wonder there is confusion though, there is a post on the pyramiding thread that says humidity is unimportant to Med torts yet a well respected tort vet from Morpeth says humidity is vital and hatchlings should really be kept in a viv for the first 2 years (in fact he also says that in his opinion, torts under 2 years old should not be sold at all), now what do we believe here? I would tend to side with the vet because .. eh.. he's a vet but what if he's completely wrong? How do we know? We can only say what has worked best for us and even that can be wrong because what has worked best just could have worked better if done differently.

Same with hibernating (or not hibernating), it's no use saying it must be done and done this way, or that it's best not done at all. The person asking the Q should be offered the advice that if they choose to do it then these are ways it can be done rather than this way is the best way. The same applies with pellets, I feed weeds when available but I have started giving pellets as well. Certain sites say NO TO PELLETS but if it comes down to bagged salad or pellets which is more beneficial? I don't know for sure so have to make a decision on info gained and would offer the same advice to a newb which would be - They eat weeds in the wild.. but pellets is also an option.. some people give bagged salad.. now you have to read all the info, ask some more questions if you like and then decide

[roofee0778]

Ok, I'll tread carefully here...

I am a new member, and I can say I have had nothing but really helpful friendly advice. I got my tortoise much earlier than planned due to unforseen circumstances, so have been asking pretty basic questions. Thankfully none of my questions have resulted in a 5 page argument, and no one has made me feel stupid, which I am very grateful for.

...... However, if I had received the response from my first post that I have seen some get recently, I wouldn't have made it past that first one. Hibernation, which is a massive worry to new owners, seems to be the worst subject (closely followed by pellets). The original question seems to disappear into the background, while people who must have had the same argument a million times have it again. I'm sure it can make the newcomer, whose question is very important to them, feel quite insignificant. A lot of you have obviously known each other a long time, and can be very blunt with each other without causing offence, but a newcomer with very little knowledge might find that a bit intimidating. I know that new owners should be made aware that there is a choice about hibernating (I didn't know there was a choice before coming on here - I thought you HAD to hibernate), but it really should feel like a choice - not like you have to join one 'side' or the other.

Again, I would say that I have had a very positive experience on here. and I hope to be asking daft questions on here for a long time. Some of the banter on here also makes me laugh out loud! I am also one of the 'fruitcakes' that commented on the tortoise that died, but hey, you can't please everyone!

I hope I haven't upset anyone with this - I really don't mean to - but I had noticed this happening as well, and can speak from a newcomer's point of view.

[ibizathetort]

I think we all agree that we respect each others views, I think it just becomes unacceptable when it becomes a bit personal.

Personally I think the best way forward would be to continue to offer our support and experiences and to just ignore any incendary comments, making a real effort to keep the thread clean and on track for the op (usually a valued newbie!)

Thats my 2 pence worth anyhoo gang

[sarah]

Im afraid some people have very strong views on certain things.
Here at Shelled Warriors we like to discuss different ways of doing things and yes sometimes this can get a bit heated and we try our best to control the threads. Some people just have very strong views.

If you dont like someones views, just ignore them.

But we will not accept rude or bullying behaviour and if you see any of this please pm a admin or mod.

[Steph37]

Originally Posted by roofee0778

Ok, I'll tread carefully here...

I am a new member, and I can say I have had nothing but really helpful friendly advice. I got my tortoise much earlier than planned due to unforseen circumstances, so have been asking pretty basic questions. Thankfully none of my questions have resulted in a 5 page argument, and no one has made me feel stupid, which I am very grateful for.

...... However, if I had received the response from my first post that I have seen some get recently, I wouldn't have made it past that first one. Hibernation, which is a massive worry to new owners, seems to be the worst subject (closely followed by pellets). The original question seems to disappear into the background, while people who must have had the same argument a million times have it again. I'm sure it can make the newcomer, whose question is very important to them, feel quite insignificant. A lot of you have obviously known each other a long time, and can be very blunt with each other without causing offence, but a newcomer with very little knowledge might find that a bit intimidating. I know that new owners should be made aware that there is a choice about hibernating (I didn't know there was a choice before coming on here - I thought you HAD to hibernate), but it really should feel like a choice - not like you have to join one 'side' or the other.

Again, I would say that I have had a very positive experience on here. and I hope to be asking daft questions on here for a long time. Some of the banter on here also makes me laugh out loud! I am also one of the 'fruitcakes' that commented on the tortoise that died, but hey, you can't please everyone!

I hope I haven't upset anyone with this - I really don't mean to - but I had noticed this happening as well, and can speak from a newcomer's point of view.

Dont worry-really really great to see a new member who has found this helpful, as I do-its a great site. I wouldnt worry about what you write if I were you-you will soon learn that 99.99999% people are here to learn-and the same majority of us who put things down are talking about what we do, we are not saying we are right. I have noticed that many poeple are feeling more and more obliged to say that 'this or that is my opinion' but when I write I am always writing my opinion in the knowledge that its ONLY my opinion, maybe right, maybe wrong, but always in the best interests of tortoises and trying to share info with and learn info from, others.

I have been foolish in getting caught up in personal attacks on others (you dont know who's related to who on here, who is friends with who outside of this forum, nor how many hours some people you know may have given to doing the most remarkable things to tortoises that many would have given up on)-and as 'novice professionals' (if there is such a thing!) have done incredibly impressive jobs at bringing half dead tortoises back to life.#

And then that's criticised and poeple are called 'fruitcakes' and 'trolls' for caring just because one out of many tortoises are lost/killed through ignorance. there is only one person who states things as fact-please dont lose sleep over it and stay and join the rest of us.
I love discussions but its the personal attacks that we (and I accuse myself hugely in resposnding to this but I wont have strangers criticsing relatives and friends of mine) need to stay out of and 'I know it all' type comments which are put in SIMPLY for the FUN of winding poeple up and ensuring they start an argument (as oppoosed to the discussions which we have and are just fun and interesting).
I work with kids with challenging behaviour and the last thing I do is get drawn in! I of all people should know not to argue back as this is what the one individuial wants and is no doubt living for posts which can be twisted and made statemnets of fact (which is one thing) but personal, even libellous comments at worst.
Sorry, I dont know your name, but I can assure you that you dont need to worry-those of us who get drawn in need to learn not to. there will then be no fun for the person we are all talking about.
Please stay and join in the good discussions we have as we are all learning all the time. And whenever I put anything, its only what I think, it doesnt mean its right, but wont be intimidated into typing that phrase in every single post as I find it diffivcult enough to type (you wouldnt think so I know!) as it is without having to justify everything I say-its all opinions only and all the decent people on here are the same.
Was just thinking of the lovely lady who was about to buy a Hermanns tortoise and simply asked 'what did she need to buy?' She got various bits of advice (ie our opinions) but dotted in between outragous comments which were totally inappropriate and she hasnt posted since. She probably now will get to know nothing about tortoise care despite her clearly good intentions and the whole site looks bad due to one person. Poor lady. Steph

[Steph37]

Originally Posted by stells

What would you like us to do??

We can't go around deleting everything that offends a few... that wouldn't be fair... we can't go around banning people because a few people don't like them... that wouldn't be fair either...

We try our best to keep threads on track... or put them back on track... and to keep SW a friendly place... but sometimes threads are going to get a little bit heated... it comes with the territory...

On the forum I belong to that is linked to a very rare neurological disablility I have, every week? or month? the moderators post a standard post that reminds people of the purpose of the board. Obviously very different type of board with very different aims and issues arising, so in this case it reminds people that we are not neurologists so when some people talk about medications and doses that have helped them, this shouldnt be taken as gospel, it says that no reference to certain medics names can be made, nor specific brands of disability equipment. It also acknowledges that through extreme pain and progressive disability people can get short tempered (with a great deal more reason than anyone on here!!) and to try to keep to the point, and that if they feel like 'venting' (must be of american origin) then they need to make clear that it is a 'venting' post, not place it in the middle of another topic. Of course you cannot ban severely disabled people from a site, but on a site like this maybe political correctness comes ahead of people using slanderous language and labels-other chelonia sites ban certain people for such things and I think that there should be warnings to people as things can spoil it for the rest of us-its different getting into an intense debate (which is fun) than making personal attacks on people and making others, as I watched swad (and I dont even know him/her) I think in a previous post, being ripped to pieces on a personal level and putting off new members. Surely if its a choice between poeple asking for help/advice and people thinking they know it all therefore not learning or contributing, we should be here for those of us who want to learn new things through sharing and discussion rather than those who dont 'need' advice. Surely we want those who are new to chelonia care learning things rather than being put off-shouldnt those poeple be the ones we put first as they are admitting (like most of us) that we dont know and are still learning on a daily basis? Steph