Hugs and kisses clare as you know I'm going through the same with my dad at the moment and I haven't been able to see him as much as he got so worked up about me going in hospital the first time so I have had to not tell him or his partner I have been in twice more as it would tip him over the edge. It's such a horrible thing to have and for others to deal with especially when they start to forget who you are but can remember what they were doing 50 years or so ago so so hard.